Wilderness living.

I think sometimes that God made each of us a little needy at times or in certain places so that it would drive us to Him.    Especially women.  Men get the reputation for being "fixers" ... but really, I think it's us women who are "fixers" ... even if our fixing means cooking up a meal or babysitting some kids or just being there, we have an inordinate need to DO.  And we tend to DO well.  After all, people are depending on us!  And I know for me, when I am firing on all cylinders and life is cruising along that I tend to little by little start doing everything in Karen power ... because I can. Until I can't. And usually the can't part is when I crash and burn in exhaustion of having done everything in my own power. I have not found the secret to stopping that cycle. But I have seen it repeated many times in my life.

 

Still reading with Priscilla in the mornings and this was from today ...

[she has just been talking about a friend going through a harsh winderness of her husband dying, being ostracized by her church and not being able to find a job to support her family now - which makes me think that my "I own a house I don't live in that loses $1000 in value a day (or so it seems), took a $17,000 pay cut, am 43 and single" worries look ridiculous ... since I have a job, house, and family!!] ... At the same time, as I've said before, the wilderness can be - as it is for me at this moment - simply a season of time you're struggling to enjoy. Maybe you find yourself often feeling frutsrated and fatigued, not to mention guilty for finding reasons to complain amidst such obvious blessings. yet, even then, it can still lead us to cry out, 'How do I keep my sense of purpose up when I can feel myself wearing down?' Even when we've begun to get a handle on some of the why He might allow the wilderness, we still want to know how we can make it through.

and she closed that section with these verses ...

Behold, I will allure her, bring her into the wilderness and speak kindly to her. Then I will give her vineyards from there, and the valley of Achor as a door of Hope. And she will sing there as in the days of her youth, as in the day when she came up from the land of Egypt (Hosea 2:14-15).

Praying that God will help us all sing in our wilderness places, sweet songs that bring balm to earth weary souls.