except THIS guy has skill.
I actually feel more like this guy.
Like I have all of these plates spinning and I am spending my life running from plate to plate trying to keep them all spinning without any of them crashing to the ground. And the fear of plates crashing to the ground are giving me some serious panic attacks and costing me some serious sleep!
I have NEVER been in this kind of place before ... kinda thought I was a good multitasker BUT working on three campuses with no staff or student leadership (yet) .. with no building (oh, but you should see my CAR!!) ... and living in two cities two hours apart ... I think I might be about to drop some plates OR lose my everloving mind.
I don't like spinning plates. I've never been an adrenalin junkie ... more like slow and steady wins the race! And when I'm spinning plates, I feel like all I am doing is keeping things moving and maintaining damage control. I am not doing ANYTHING well. I am missing opportunities to just be with people because I am flitting from one plate to the next. I am not organized or efficient. I am not intentional or dealing with the important as much as the stuff that is just about to fall! I'm dropping things that matter ... and those "things" are usually people!
Seems like I am living life just a few hours ahead of where I need to be and it's relentless. Today consisted of trying to sign students up for spring break mission trip while finishing up summer missions applications while trying to find speakers for our weekly Faith in Practice at GHSU (which might be about to kill me now) while coordinating small groups at ASU while planning BCM stuff for ASU this week while reserving a van and organizing details for a disaster relief trip in two weeks while scheduling doctors appts (it might have been a while ... dreaming of some good drugs they might could give me) ... while driving back to Augusta in the rain and fog, setting up google+ for an online meeting tomorrow, begging for more money for spring break missions, talking to people on facebook, email, and text ALL at the same time, scheduling meetings for tomorrow and telling a church that "no, I have not found D Now leaders for them yet" ... I don't know how Moms do it!
I'm pretty well aware that THIS is not the kind of life God intends for us. I am TRYING to figure out how to give Him back His plates. I am trying to pray more and worry less. I am learning to ask for help, even when it is denied or ignored. I am trying to realize that some plates are not mine to spin. And I am praying for the day that I do not wake up three times a night panicked over some detail of my current and/or future life. AND, I am certain that I will not be giving up Diet Coke anytime soon.
1 comment:
The bad week continues. However, I realized that others are having worst weeks. My friend Jenni locked herself out of the house where her keys were for her car in the pouring rain yesterday. Then this morning when I was thinking about reading, she called and had been in a wreck and totaled her car. She is okay except for emotionally drained, however, the person she hit was taken to the hospital. I'm glad she is okay. I'm thankful for friends and praying this week gets better.
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