Dear Daylight Savings Time,

I am NOT a fan.  Oh, I know, I'll love it this summer when we have to wait til 9 pm for it to be dark enough for fireworks ... or not.  I would say that I enjoy the longer days, but alas, every day I've been able to come home before dark, it's been dreary.  SOOOO, I'd like to politely ask for the hour of my life you confiscated last week because it has left me a wreck!

Sincerely,
Karen

SOOOOO ... I know it's not all the fault of my missing hour ... but I have some serious missing mojo ... and I would love it back as much as I'd love that lost hour!!  I don't want to do ANYTHING ... don't want to exercise ... or clean ... or fill out the stinkin' census form ... or pay bills ... or do crafty things ... or do not crafty things ... don't want to read ... or write (thus the lack of bloggy things the last week) ... I think I'd like to lay on a sunny, WARM beach for a few days, pretend I don't have job stuff, read just for fun ... and come home to a different life.

I DID finally motivate myself to get up and go for a treadmill jog ... not hardcore enough for the cold and the rain ... HATE running in the rain if we're gonna be honest ... and not for one minute did I wish I was running the ING yesterday.  But I realized this funk that I'm in (yeh, I know) ... well, it might have more to do with the fact that I worked Tuesday night, Wednesday night, Thursday night, Friday night, Saturday, Sunday ... and even missed small group last night ... soooooooo, in that time, I've not just gotten to hang out with one single person that is nonwork (except for an hour with Gini last Tuesday) in a week!  Oh my word!  Sounds very reasonable when I look at it that way.  Shouldn't I be due a FUNK???  And this week ... let's see, I have a missions dinner tomorrow night ... before Gathering, a women's worship night Thursday night and an alumni dinner (oh please, help me contain my desire to be there!!!!) Saturday night!  I love doing the missions dinner and I love Image nights ... but for the love, I'm worn out on things I "love" ... this morning, Franklin said, "I can see the light at the end of the tunnel" ... well, I can't .... it's a long ways to the end of my tunnel ... and yep, it's my tunnel ... cause ain't nobody taking that train with me.

SOOO ... time to get some "mojo" back ... I don't really need to stay on this track I'm on ... cause it's not pretty and it's not grace-filled.  It's 100% Karen's efforts ... and that's not what I want my students to see. 

When I look back on the last week, I guess I didn't do as bad as it seems ... I still got in four runs, still had a quiet time every day, still ate healthy some of the time ... so I'm not the train wreck I feel like ... but for this week, I would love to have things I WANT to write about ... things God's doing and showing me.  I would love to keep up the running ... and eat healthier (should be easier NOT eating so many meals at BCM!) ... I would LOVE to hang out with nonwork people ... and I am just ready for my heart to be in a better place.  Right now, it's overwhelmed with work and discouraged with life.  It's just one of those weeks when being tired trumps being hopeful.  I really have no reason to be in a funk ... I have a job.  That's HUGE right now, especially when I am praying for friends who don't.  I might be tired, but I'm healthy ... and so is my family ... that's not something I want to take for granted.  I might be single ... but I know from my sweet friends that being married doesn't take away the struggles.  I think lots of it is taking the time to take my eyes off of me ... and the things I think make life tough now ... and refocus to the needs of those around me.  Kind of hard to see those when you just see ME!

Gonna peace out with some verses that are on my heart tonight.  So thankful for TRUTH in the midst of emotions that are unreliable at best!!

But now, God's Message, the God who made you in the first place, Jacob,

the One who got you started, Israel:

"Don't be afraid, I've redeemed you.

I've called your name. You're mine.

When you're in over your head, I'll be there with you.

When you're in rough waters, you will not go down.

When you're between a rock and a hard place,

it won't be a dead end—

Because I am God, your personal God,

The Holy of Israel, your Savior.

I paid a huge price for you:

all of Egypt, with rich Cush and Seba thrown in!

That's how much you mean to me!

That's how much I love you!

I'd sell off the whole world to get you back,

Trade the creation just for you.

So don't be afraid: I'm with you.

I'll round up all your scattered children,

pull them in from east and west.

I'll send orders north and south:

'Send them back.

Return my sons from distant lands,

my daughters from faraway places.

I want them back, every last one who bears my name,

every man, woman, and child

Whom I created for my glory,

yes, personally formed and made each one.'"

Is. 43:1-7 (MSG)