a weekend OFF

I had some BIG plans for spring break.  I was dreaming about all of the catching up I was gonna do: catch up on office stuff, like planning for the Mexico Mission trip, and the plethora of events coming up in the next two weeks.  I mean, there is nothing more heavenly than a day or two ... or  a week in the office with NO meetings.  I was gonna catch up on sleep because I could come home every night (again, no events)... and I was finally gonna have a clean house again!!  I was gonna have leisurely lunches with longlost friends and spend some extra time with nursing students.  AND, I was planning a surprise trip home over the weekend for my bro's birthday and because I was gonna be so rested and could.

BUT ... then there is reality.  The week before spring "break" I worked two dinner theater shows and found out the plans to close the nursing school.  Which meant I also went to meetings, talked to students and started making plans for I HEART SONAT week.  Just to keep up, I worked all Sunday afternoon, stopping only long enough for small group ... and then the ten hour days began ... I sometimes I thought I might hyperventilate when I looked too long at the "to do" list that was not getting done and when I came home, I wasn't getting the house clean or getting caught up on sleep, I was working on the stuff I didn't get done that day ... until I fell alseep.  Nope.  Didn't happen according to plan.  I DID have some amazing conversations at SONAT and I am so thankful for that place ... and in the midst of all that was going on, not only was I exhausted, but subconsciously, I was also afraid of what (my) life would look like without the nursing school across town.  About Thursday, I was exhausted, overwhelmed, and even a little depressed and this verse came to mind ...

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.

Prov. 13:12

Isn't that what it's about?  The "e" word ... EXPECTATION!!  When we don't get what we expect, it's heartbreaking, energy-sucking, frustrating.  NOTHING about my week was what I expected ... not that it was bad, but it wasn't what I had been longing for.  I had some wonderful conversations that I wouldn't trade.  But I was also getting up super early to get breakfast to the school at 8 am.  There was no relaxing ... and I was actually getting more and more behind by the minute!  SO, I ditched my plans for the surprise trip home (grateful that it was a "surprise"), pretty sure I couldn't drive the 10 hours, let alone do anything but sleep for the 2 days I'd be there.  But, I decided I was still gonna be "out" if I was gonna survive the next few weeks ... and I said "no" to the 6 or 7 amazing, fun offers of things to do this weekend.  And I SLEPT, I read ... both for fun and for good.  Finished So Long Insecurity.  Still chewing on that one.  And started Scouting the Divine.  Big fan of that one!  Read about sheep, a lot about sheep and it was so good ... expect more on that later.  And my house is CLEAN ... not just tidied up (although I must confess I did stick some stuff under the bed and in the closet, but just a little).  I got in some good runs.  I did a little cooking ... shopped for some healthy food ... did I say I slept, slept later than I have in years ... and took naps.  FINALLY, a real weekend OFF!

ANd just in time since tomorrow's Monday ... and it's leadership interviews which means: 13+ hr days Tuesday AND Wednesday AND Thursday ... and SATURDAY!  YIKES!!!  I hope there's some sleep stockpiled in there ... and I am thankful for the longing fulfilled .... for sweet sleep, for time to read and think and pray and process ... for a clean house (amazing how much good that does!) and a new week!  AND, Friday, the announcement came that no MCG programs will be eliminated ... so SONAT is safe ... and God has given me many new friends and many new opportunities there!  Again ... longing fulfilled!