I just don't like it. I'm not good at it. Maybe those two things go hand in hand.
BUT, it is good for me. I can do it anywhere ... even inside on my nifty little treadmill. And it is the only sport/athletic endeavor I have any shot at doing.
So, thus, the LOVE/HATE relationship.
I LOVE the thought of being a good runner. I LOVE cool races. I LOVE cool medals. I LOVE that indeed, I can mind over matter distance (although not speed ... and thus, the HATE than most 90 year old grandmas can beat me.)
BUT ... back on my healthy kick for the year ... and it's almost the end of January and I am still on it. Counting those points again (yeh, the love/hate relationship with WW might be another post for another day). And back to running. Cause I have to. A few races on the horizon ... not that for me it's a race against anyone but the truck that picks up the really slow people ... but it is a goal. And I do, oh so much better, when there is a goal! SO, after a long sabbatical of nothing more than some walk/runs that I didn't take too seriously, I was back on the treadmill wondering if perhaps I could RUN the whole 5K at Yargo in three weeks. And since I DID manage to RUN 2 of my 4 miles without stopping today ... kind of hard to believe marathons and halfs were in my past ... I think I can.
And that's how I get through running ... I think I can. I think I can. I think I can. I play every game I can come up with to keep myself going... and I take it every 5 minute segment at a time ... but once the clock starts the next segment I am committed to the whole of the 5 minutes ... and for someone as slow as me, running 3 miles takes a lot of 5 minute segments.
But isn't that our life? Don't we have a love/hate relationship with so many parts of it?? It's HARD. It's LONG. It's frustrating at times and disappointing at times. And it is relentless. But we have to run it. Because somedays we actually can breathe well enough to look around us and enjoy what we are passing. And somedays we have someone awesome running alongside us. And somedays we actually get that elusive "runner's high" ... somedays. So, we run without giving up ... even if we have to do it 5 minutes at a time. Because it's good for us. Because it's necessary. And one day because we love it. But I don't just want to run. I want to run well. I want to do those 10 minute miles ... with ease. I want to do those 10 miles runs and enjoy it. I don't want to just survive it. I want to love it. SO, I'm gonna keep training and gonna keep trying. And I want to hear "well done" at the end of both of those races!
You've all been to the stadium and seen the athletes race. Everyone runs; one wins. Run to win. All good athletes train hard. They do it for a gold medal that tarnishes and fades. You're after one that's gold eternally.
I Corinthians 9:24 (Msg)
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