Present.

It's spring break this week (finally!)  And my big plans are to sleep late every day ... and write all my National Board entries.    Seems pretty straight forward.  Seems kind of daunting as well, to me, since how and what to write is a little unknown ... except that it's about 100 pages of analysis and defense of my teaching.

So, all of that being said, I've not made plans this week ... spending one day with my mom ... and really, I'm ok with that.  Have cleaned my house from top to bottom (because that's what you do when you are putting off something you want to do less, right??!!)  Funny story, when I climbed into bed last night, I realized that I might actually kill myself with the bleach fumes from my shower ... so I opened a window ... and then froze all night, cause y'all, it might look like spring, but do not be deceived!

One plan I did make was to meet a friend for lunch.  We've been friends, probably since birth ... I don't ever remember not being friends ... and while life didn't make us best friends for a season, it has made us steady friends for a lifetime.  She gives me reasons to be thankful I am here.  And I love how God has shaped a family for she and her husband through adoption - it's beautiful, really.

So, when my spring break and her day off gave us a lunch date, I knew that was one plan I was making and I am so glad I did.  I didn't do any writing today.  I ran errands, had a long, leisurely, heart-to-heart lunch, and I took a nap.  The planner in me is thinking, "Uh-oh, not your best move." But the person who needed to listen and talk and be known and to know ... she is pretty happy with today.

I saw this on Shauna's blog a few months ago ... I think around Christmas and it has resonated with me ever since.  I have a hard time being present, really just enjoying the moment, sometimes.  Sometimes I am wishing for what was ... and missing the beauty of what now is.  And sometimes I am so worried about the future (those national boards that I'd really like to pass on the first try) that I miss something valuable right there.  I am the Queen of planning out in my head what has to happen each moment to get to point B ... and I've missed out of some awesome side trips because of it.  I still have a lot of writing to do this week ... but you know what, it's not due this week and if I need to continue to write and revise over the next few weeks, then so be it.  There are some gifts I need to enjoy today, even if it's as simple as an afternoon nap ... or an afternoon run!

Gonna work on it.  Being present, that is.  There's not going to be another today.  And I'm pretty ok with how this one turned out.